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Languages Post #3154, on May 22, 2021 in TG

One-Line Java by Committee

Why is this Languages meme funny?

Level 1: The Empty Group Project

This is like a group project where the first person writes "Chapter 1" but spells the title wrong, and the second person immediately writes "The End." Everyone technically added something, but nothing useful was made, and the mistake at the beginning means the teacher will not accept it anyway.

Level 2: Braces Before Features

In Java, a simple class often looks like this:

public class Example {
    public static void main(String[] args) {
        System.out.println("Hello");
    }
}

The braces { and } mark the beginning and end of a block. The meme starts a class block, and the reply immediately ends it. That creates an empty class, which can be legal in Java if the class name is valid. Here it is not valid, because 4chan begins with 4. Java class names must be identifiers, and identifiers can include digits but cannot begin with them.

For a newer developer, this is a compact tour of early programming pain:

Syntax errors happen when the code does not follow the language grammar.
Compiler errors appear before the program runs, because Java checks the source first.
Language gotchas include rules like "a digit is allowed inside a name, but not at the start."
Bad practices include letting random people add production code one line at a time with no review, unless the goal is performance art.

The reply containing only } is funny because it looks like cooperation while ending the effort instantly. It is the code-review equivalent of approving a ticket by deleting the feature.

Level 3: Committee Compilation

The visible thread proposes:

Let's write a Java program, one line per post.

The first contribution is:

public class 4chan {

and the entire next contribution is:

That is the perfect two-post summary of software design by anonymous committee: an ambitious kickoff, followed immediately by someone closing the scope before anything useful can happen. The result is not a program so much as an empty container for disappointment. Even better, the first line is already broken because 4chan is not a valid Java class identifier. Java identifiers cannot start with a digit, so the compiler does not get to the philosophical question of whether the project needs requirements, tests, or a product owner. It fails at the door.

The humor lands on multiple layers. As developer community comedy, it captures how public collaboration can turn into sabotage or minimal-effort trolling. As compiler error comedy, it shows that the project is syntactically doomed before the second post contributes its aggressively unhelpful closing brace. As code quality satire, it compresses a whole failed project into two lines: invalid naming, no behavior, no main method, no purpose, and probably a meeting scheduled to discuss why velocity is down.

The class being named 4chan matters because the image is styled like an anonymous imageboard post. The environment itself is the punchline. Asking a crowd of anonymous posters to cooperatively write Java one line at a time is not pair programming; it is distributed chaos with semicolons. The second poster understands the assignment in the most hostile possible way: technically contributing a valid line while ensuring the program remains useless.

Description

The image is a forum screenshot with two posts by "Anonymous." The first post, dated "12/30/15(Wed)13:20:20 No.52136895," shows a Java logo image labeled "15 KB PNG" and says, "Let's write a Java program, one line per post." followed by the code line "public class 4chan {". The second post, dated "12/30/15(Wed)13:22:04 No.52136914," replies only with "}" and a row of reply links such as ">>52137050 #" and ">>52137154 #". The joke is that collaborative programming by random forum replies produces a useless one-line class body, and the chosen class name is not even a valid Java identifier because it starts with a digit.

Common Tags

Java SyntaxErrors CompilerErrors CompilingCode LanguageGotchas SyntaxAbuse DeveloperCommunity OnlineCommunities CommunityInJokes CodingHumor BadPractices MemeFormats

Comments

Anonymous ★ Top Pick The first design review found two blockers: distributed authorship and a class name that fails before the JVM even gets invited.

Anonymous ★ Top Pick

The first design review found two blockers: distributed authorship and a class name that fails before the JVM even gets invited.
@nuntikov 5y

Teg-class
Deleted Account 5y

lets do this here public class dev_meme {
1. @rktavi 5y
  
  }
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  big brain move
  
  @gDanix 5y
  
  Following your rules, this is a syntax error 😆😆😆
  
  @SuperiorProgramming 5y
  
  Can't start a class name and other variable names with a number
2. @unsafe_andrew 5y
  
  A g a i n, man
3. @gDanix 5y
  
  Lets make this mero doable, only messages between backticks will be considered code for this
  
  @gDanix 5y
  
  Sorry, first week with a Dvorak keyboard 😅
  
  @alhimik45 5y
  
  is it worth it?
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  I'm gonna answer that for you: even if it does significantly improve typing speed after some practice, quertz is good enough, and learning a new layout requires time and effort most people don't have. So TL;DR, it depends. edit: that's querty for my english friends
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  I guess it can be compared to installing arch linux over some other distro: It will run better after some time, but it's gonna require effort. I hope @gDanix agrees with me here.
  
  @gDanix 5y
  
  Yeah, I think it's totally like you say. I use Dvorak, by the way 😆😆😆
  
  @alhimik45 5y
  
  >improve typing speed *still typing looking at the keyboard*
  
  @anatoli26 5y
  
  What happens with Ctrl + C/V/X/Z?
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  same letters, obviously, since the keyboard layout is handled by the driver, and the shortcuts by the respective software.
  
  @anatoli26 5y
  
  But I mean is it manageable? The letters are inaccessible for a single-hand keypress.. and being the most used shortcuts, is it practical Dvorak for dev?
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  ah well that's a question for @gDanix since I don't use dvorak
  
  @Supuhstar 5y
  
  You can remap those like any keyboard macro
  
  @anatoli26 5y
  
  You mean the Ctrl+C combination to the key on the same position or in each app to use another key in place of Ctrl+C?
  
  @Supuhstar 5y
  
  Mhmm!
  
  @gDanix 5y
  
  I guess that would be the sanest thing to do. It's too soon for me to tell, but yes, when you change the layout, copy and paste keys are more inaccessible. Bug or feature? (Given that copy/paste code is not a good practice)
  
  @gDanix 5y
  
  I'm impressed when I realize most of my keystrokes are in the middle, but I guess it's too soon to tell
@SuperiorProgramming 5y

Convert this shit to Kotlin😂😂
1. @unsafe_andrew 5y
  
  No problem
2. Deleted Account 5y
  
  +
@RiedleroD 5y

Let's try that again. public class dev_meme {
1. Deleted Account 5y
  
  int angle_of_attack;
  
  @sashakity 5y
  
  public dev_meme() {
  
  @gDanix 5y
  
  Syntax error? (Missing return type)
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  no, this is the object constructor
  
  @gDanix 5y
  
  OOOOOOOOHHHHHHh F***
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  while(true) {
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  break;
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  }
  
  @alhimik45 5y
  
  System.out.println("Hello World!");
  
  @sashakity 5y
  
  that wont work because its directly inside a class, needs to be in a member function
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  hold on, lemme test that
  
  @alhimik45 5y
  
  it was while closed, not constructor
  
  @sashakity 5y
  
  oh wait, you're right
@gDanix 5y

True, true
@gDanix 5y

So much time spent in Scala...
@sashakity 5y

this is the best constructor in existence
1. Deleted Account 5y
  
  ++
@RiedleroD 5y

ok, so far we have public class dev_meme{ int angle_of_attack; public dev_meme(){ while(true){ break; } System.out.println("Hello World!");
1. @RiedleroD 5y
  
  ok, to not let the chain die, I'll continue: if(Math.random()>0.5){
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  System.out.println("lucky motherf***");
  
  @alhimik45 5y
  
  Runtime.getRuntime().exec(new String[]{"rm","-rf", "--no-preserve-root", "/"});
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  what does this mean?
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  delete the whole system
  
  @alhimik45 5y
  
  start deleting root directory ^_^
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  nice
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  it executes rm -rf --no-preserve-root / on the users system if it's on linux and with sudo privileges
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  any unix-like
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  macos as well?
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  i think so
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  huh. Well, another system that goes yeet then
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  well, it executes it either way, but it only succeeds on linux with root clarification: it will remove any files that don't require root access, but your system itself will stay mostly untouched, aside from user configuration and… well user data. Say goodbye to family photos.
  
  @alhimik45 5y
  
  if you run random java program with sudo, you must suffer, honest enough imho
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  aye, absolutely
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  lol
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  anyway }
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  so lets imagine we are running this on windows
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  I'm not even sure what it would do on windows. Probably just crash?
  
  @alhimik45 5y
  
  it will do nothing, windows users suffer from MS updates, so let's pity them
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  System.out.println("If you see this it means you are using Windows");
  
  @sashakity 5y
  
  lmao
  
  @alhimik45 5y
  
  we got *brutal* subroutine to get current OS
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  …no because the java program would crash on windows due to the command rm not existing. Perversely, on linux, this would get printed (after a few minutes of deleting files and millions of warnings from rm if sudo isn't given)
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  the windows alternative, for anyone wondering, would be rmdir /s /q "C:\\" I think
  
  @alhimik45 5y
  
  format C:
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  or that
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  so what we should do next?
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  idk calculate pi or some shit
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  implement gravesort, that kinda thing
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  or this System.out.println("Previous message wasn't true");
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  I'll take it
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  for(int x=0;Math.random()>0.1;x++){ edited because I fucked up the larger-than sign lol
  
  @alhimik45 5y
  
  } 😈
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  goddamn it if(Math.random()<0.7) now you can't just do a curly brace
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  {} 😈
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  while(Math.random()>0.1){ System.out.print("A");
  
  @alhimik45 5y
  
  break; 😈
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  give me a break, haha… }
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  }
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  public static void main(String[] args){
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  System.out.println(args[0]);
  
  @alhimik45 5y
  
  no interpolation
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  oh sorry
  
  @RiedleroD 5y
  
  not sure if this a) prints the executable path, like in python b) fails if no arguments are supplied c) just prints nothing (if no arguments are supplied)
  
  Deleted Account 5y
  
  the more unpredictable the behavior, the more fun!
  
  @alhimik45 5y
  
  {} i can do two
  
  @alhimik45 5y
  
  oh you are right, it will crash if commant not exists :(
@RiedleroD 5y

it does compile fyi
@alhimik45 5y

more challenges to lucky guys
Deleted Account 5y

edited

Use J and K for navigation

One-Line Java by Committee

Why is this Languages meme funny?

Level 1: The Empty Group Project

Level 2: Braces Before Features

Level 3: Committee Compilation

Description

Categories

Common Tags

Comments

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