Journalism Reaches Peak Redundancy with Lasers Firing at the Speed of Light
Description
The image displays a screenshot of a news article preview from 'Metro'. The top portion of the preview shows a close-up photo of a yellow artillery shell, possibly a mortar round, with black stenciled text on it. The bottom, darker portion contains the headline: 'Army's newest weapon that can fire lasers at the speed of light'. The humor is aimed squarely at a technically literate audience who would immediately spot the scientific tautology in the headline. Lasers, being a form of light, inherently travel at the speed of light. Stating this is as redundant as saying 'wet water' or 'hot fire'. The meme mocks sensationalist or scientifically illiterate journalism that attempts to sound impressive but instead reveals a fundamental lack of understanding of the subject matter, a common frustration for engineers and scientists
Comments
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Our new deployment pipeline is so efficient, it ships code at the speed of execution. It's a game-changer
Marketing just promised the board our next API will deliver data “at the speed of light” - so I guess the upcoming sprint is provisioning vacuum-grade Kubernetes
This is like announcing a breakthrough in TCP/IP that allows packets to travel at the speed of electricity through copper, or proudly deploying a new Kubernetes cluster that runs containers inside... containers. Next they'll revolutionize computing with CPUs that execute instructions at the speed of electrons
Ah yes, the revolutionary breakthrough: lasers that travel at the speed of light. Next up, they'll announce water that's wet and TCP packets that arrive in order. This is what happens when marketing departments discover physics terms but skip the actual physics course - claiming you can 'fire lasers at the speed of light' is like bragging your new compiler 'executes instructions at CPU speed.' The real innovation here isn't the weapon; it's convincing executives that c = 299,792,458 m/s is a feature, not a fundamental constant of the universe
SRE nirvana: deploys at Mach 2 for instant cluster illumination - no agents, just pray the parachute doesn't tangle your traces
PM: “It fires lasers at the speed of light.” Eng: “Perfect - finally an SLA backed by a universal constant. Now open a ticket to deploy vacuum to prod so humidity doesn’t tank our latency SLO.”
This is the defense-industry version of “global datastore with instant consistency” - ping me when Marketing ships the patch that beats c in fiber
...k... Comment deleted
Doesn’t all light travel at the speed of light 👀 Comment deleted
Ackchyually, almost no light travels at the speed of light, as there is not that many places with absolute vacuum Comment deleted
ackchyually all light travels at speed of light if we're not talking about constant Comment deleted
a human is traveling at a speed of human 🤝 Comment deleted
🤫 Comment deleted
no, between point a and b in relation to measuring device on earth it is moving slower than light speed. Even in a vacuum light can be slowed by gravity waves (by prolongating trajectory). Comment deleted
they fucked up the phrasing, but I assume they meant something like "a weapon that can shoot at the speed of light, by using lasers", not that they underlined that lasers are fired at the speed of light Comment deleted
That would be too many checks for the collision server, thanks Comment deleted
depending on how you define it light slows in different environments. It moves faster in vacuum an slower in water i.e Comment deleted
they might have overcooked Comment deleted
If the light can travel at the same speed of light in vacuum through the air it is revolutionary Comment deleted
I think what they were looking for is a gun. No need to reinvent. Thank me later. Comment deleted
guys this is an exaggeration about time interval between two shots or in other words rate of fire Comment deleted
This weapon can shoot lasers at the speed of light. At defines target. They intend to kill concept of speed of light with lasers. 😂 Comment deleted
human is traveling at a speed of human Comment deleted