Skip to content
DevMeme
6480 of 7590
PackageManagement Post #7105 · source on Telegram

My Dad Works for Canonical and Will Turn You Into a Snap Package

Description

A classic 'my dad works at' schoolyard bully meme showing a chubby kid in a striped shirt with aggressive posture. The text reads 'SHUT UP! My dad works for' followed by the Canonical (Ubuntu) logo, then 'And can turn you into a snap package'. The 'made with mematic' watermark is visible in the bottom left. The joke references the controversial push by Canonical to replace traditional Linux packages with Snap packages, which many in the Linux community view as forced and unwelcome bloatware with slower startup times and sandboxing issues

Comments

18
Anonymous ★ Top Pick Getting snap-packaged is the Linux equivalent of being wrapped in 17 layers of bubble wrap -- technically protected, but unable to move or breathe at normal speed
  1. Anonymous ★ Top Pick

    Getting snap-packaged is the Linux equivalent of being wrapped in 17 layers of bubble wrap -- technically protected, but unable to move or breathe at normal speed

  2. Anonymous

    Being turned into a snap package is the ultimate horror: you're suddenly bloated, nobody can figure out your permissions, and you automatically update at 3 AM on a Friday, breaking everyone's workflow

  3. Anonymous

    Careful - once you’re snap-packaged, every coffee break starts with a 3-second cold-start penalty

  4. Anonymous

    The real threat isn't being turned into a snap package - it's having to wait for it to cold-start every time someone tries to execute you, while your systemd mount units multiply faster than a fork bomb in /etc

  5. Anonymous

    Ah yes, Canonical's approach to package management: 'You will use Snap and you will like it' - because nothing says 'open source freedom' quite like replacing your carefully curated apt packages with containerized blobs that mount as loop devices, consume 3x the disk space, and take 5 seconds to launch a text editor. At least when your dad works for Canonical, you get the privilege of explaining to your users why Firefox now takes longer to start than a JVM application from 2005

  6. Anonymous

    Forget SIGKILL - Canonical's real weapon: snapping your app into 10-second startup hell

  7. Anonymous

    Go ahead, turn me into a Snap - immutable, AppArmor-constrained, and slower at cold start while snapd loop-mounts; dependency hell traded for operational purgatory

  8. Anonymous

    Careful - he’ll repackage you as a Snap: 90MB of squashfs, a systemd timer for surprise auto‑updates, and a cold start that makes dpkg feel real‑time

  9. @NickNirus 11mo

    i don't understand why snap exists

    1. @yourdisenchantment 11mo

      snap is created as a native solution of canonical with more protection and the ability to centrally manage these packages in the OS. there is also written about super security, but for now, snap is more unstable than secure

    2. @pyrothefuck 11mo

      Ubuntu wanted its own flatpak

      1. @NickNirus 11mo

        exactly, for what purpose

        1. @hur7m3 11mo

          xkcd_927.jpg

          1. Deleted Account 11mo

            This?

          2. @SamsonovAnton 11mo

            A Brief History of Windows Programming Revolutions By Ron Burk, December 01, 2009 Eliminating DLL-Hell — again First, there was the Windows API and DLL Hell. Revolution # 1 was DDE — remember how hot links let us create status bars showing the current price of Microsoft stock? About that time, Microsoft created the VERSIONINFO resource, which eliminated DLL Hell. But another group within Microsoft discovered a fatal flaw in DDE: they didn't write it! To solve that problem, they created OLE (which was like DDE, only different), and I fondly remember a Microsoft conference speaker proclaiming that the Windows API would soon be rewritten as an OLE API, and every control on the screen would be an OCX. OLE introduced interfaces, which eliminated DLL Hell. Remember "in situ" fever, and how we dreamed of the day that our applications would all be embedded in a (apparently very large) Word document? Somewhere in there, Microsoft got the C++ religion and MFC emerged and solved all our problems again, but with inheritance. Well, OLE wasn't going to take that sitting down, so it re-emerged as COM, and suddenly we realized what OLE (or was it DDE?) was really meant to be all along — and it even included an elaborate component version system that eliminated DLL Hell. Meanwhile, a renegade group within Microsoft discovered a fatal flaw in MFC: they didn't write it! They forthwith corrected that problem by creating ATL, which is like MFC, only different, and tried to hide all those fascinating details that the COM group was trying so hard to teach us. This stimulated the COM group (or was it OLE?) to rename themselves ActiveX and issue hundreds of pounds of new interfaces (even new versioning interfaces, which eliminated DLL Hell), along with the ability to make all our code downloadable via web browsers, complete with user-selectable viruses (ha — try to keep up with that, you ATL weenies!). Like a neglected middle child, the operating systems group cried out for attention by telling us all to "get ready for Cairo", some weird crud that they could never really explain, let alone ship. To their credit, however, the operating system group did introduce the concept of "System File Protection", which eliminated DLL Hell. Meanwhile, another group inside Microsoft discovered a fatal flaw in Java: they didn't write it! That was remedied by creating J, or Jole, or ActiveJ (honestly, I can't remember the name), which was like Java, only different. That was very exciting, but Sun sued Microsoft under some archaic law that limits the amount of crapulence any one company can ship in a year. This was clearly an attempt to stifle Microsoft's freedom to create products that are like other products, only different, and resulted in the creation of The Microsoft Freedom to Stuff Money in the Trousers of Congressmen Network (newsletter and $14.75 T-shirts available). Remember the J/Jole/ActiveJ program manager pounding his shoe on the table and insisting that Microsoft would never abandon his product? Silly wabbit! All this could mean only one thing — too little attention for the ActiveX (or was it COM?) group. This incredibly resilient herd of API gushers came back strong with COM+ (shouldn't that have been ActiveX+?), and MTS. (I have no idea why there's no "COM" or "Active" or "X" or "+" in "MTS" — they totally shocked me with that one!) They also threatened to add yet another "+" onto all their buzzwords in the very near future. Around that time, someone was yelling about "Windows DNA" and the "Windows Washboard" for a while, but that died out before I ever figured out what it was.

          3. @SamsonovAnton 11mo

            At this point, Microsoft had been watching the Internet for several years with growing unease. Recently, they came to the realization that there was a fatal flaw in the Internet: well, you probably know what it was. And that brings us up to date with .NET (pronounced like "doughnut", only different), which is like the Internet, only with more press releases. Let's be very, very clear about one thing: .NET will eliminate DLL Hell. .NET includes a new programming language called C# (turns out there was a fatal flaw in Active++Jspresso, so just as well it died). .NET includes a virtual runtime machine that all languages will use (turns out there's a fatal flaw in relying on Intel CPUs). .NET includes a single logon system (turns out there's a fatal flaw in not storing all your passwords on Microsoft's servers). In fact, it's probably easier to list all the things that .NET does not include. .NET is absolutely going to revolutionize Windows programming... until next year.

  10. @Johnny_bit 11mo

    appimage better

  11. @Diotost 11mo

    And now this large chain of fatal flaws brought us Windows 11.

Use J and K for navigation