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When Recruiters Write Technically Impossible Job Descriptions
Career HR Post #4084 · source on Telegram

When Recruiters Write Technically Impossible Job Descriptions

Description

A screenshot of a tweet from the user 'Memeloper' (@iammemeloper) on a black background. The tweet text reads: 'Recruiters be like: We're looking for someone who can connect to the database using CSS.' This meme humorously exaggerates the technical misunderstandings that can occur when non-technical recruiters try to hire for highly technical software development roles. The joke lies in the absurdity of the request: CSS (Cascading Style Sheets) is a language used for styling the visual presentation of web pages, while connecting to a database is a backend function handled by languages like Python, Java, or SQL. For experienced developers, this is a deeply relatable jab at the often-frustrating experience of dealing with recruiters who rely on buzzwords without understanding their meaning, leading to nonsensical job requirements

Categories

Career HR Interviews DevCommunities Communication

Common Tags

TechRecruiting Hiring Career MisalignedExpectations RequirementsAmbiguity CommunicationBreakdown Relatability DeveloperFrustration

Comments

33
Anonymous ★ Top Pick The job also required 10 years of experience in Kubernetes, a PhD in centering divs, and the ability to perform schema migrations with only `:hover` pseudo-classes
  1. Anonymous ★ Top Pick

    The job also required 10 years of experience in Kubernetes, a PhD in centering divs, and the ability to perform schema migrations with only `:hover` pseudo-classes

  2. Anonymous

    Next week they’ll want someone who can left-pad a Kafka topic with HTML

  3. Anonymous

    The same recruiter who rejected my CSS-based ORM is now asking why our database queries don't have proper media queries for mobile optimization

  4. Anonymous

    To be fair, with enough attribute selectors and a keylogging stylesheet, CSS exfiltrating your database isn't a joke - it's a CVE

  5. Anonymous

    Ah yes, CSS database connectivity - right after we finish implementing our MongoDB queries in HTML and writing our authentication logic in JPEG. This perfectly captures the moment when a recruiter's LinkedIn keyword search becomes a job requirement, resulting in positions that ask for 10 years of experience in technologies that are 3 years old, or in this case, expecting a styling language to handle data persistence. It's the technical equivalent of asking a painter to perform surgery because they both work with 'bodies' - a category error so fundamental it reveals a complete absence of domain knowledge in the hiring pipeline

  6. Anonymous

    Recruiters' full-stack dream: CSS selectors querying tables, because who needs SQL when you can just style your JOINs?

  7. Anonymous

    If the JD expects database connections via CSS, prepare for an architecture where presentation, transport, and persistence collapse into one box labeled ‘web’ - the only thing that scales is the confusion

  8. Anonymous

    Connecting to a DB with CSS is the layered-architecture equivalent of asking DNS to render your React app

  9. @sylfn 4y

    counter strike: source

    1. Deleted Account 4y

      so you can visit tge database in 3d

      1. @feskow 4y

        afaik css can do 3d

        1. @sylfn 4y

          havent seen 2D counter strike

          1. @sylfn 4y

            there is no "potato pc" edition of it

        2. Deleted Account 4y

          of course, garrys mod is a great example, also contagion and left4dead

          1. @feskow 4y

            I don't know if you're joking anymore 😅

      2. @dugeru42 4y

        break tables with he erase data with flash increment int with bullets

        1. @feskow 4y

          he?

          1. @dugeru42 4y

            Hierarchy Exception grenade

  10. dev_meme 4y

    https://css-tricks.com/roman-empire-made-pure-css-connect-4-possible/

  11. @sylfn 4y

    Please use Rus- English in this chat --- add a translation

    1. @iolebedev 4y

      Oh, sorry. I mean it would be funny if the subject turns out to be technically possible. Because modern CSS has expressions and they may be Turing complete.

      1. @sylfn 4y

        https://stackoverflow.com/questions/2497146/is-css-turing-complete They say it is

      2. @Agent1378 4y

        Turing completeness doesn't mean it has interfaces necessary for DB connection

        1. @iolebedev 4y

          yes, sure, Just a way of saying that CSS might have something.

          1. @Agent1378 4y

            It has lots of pain and misery for us.

        2. @theodolu 4y

          It means you can emulate a computer with any db tools in it

          1. @Agent1378 4y

            Thank you, captain. Emulating DB inside the CSS is a task better left untouched LOL

            1. @theodolu 4y

              You won't need to emulate entire db though, only db access

              1. @Agent1378 4y

                No that doesn't count. I want at least SQL99 DB in my CSS!

                1. @sylfn 4y

                  if JS in IE6 can do it, then you can do it in CSS (IE6 ver.)

                  1. @sylfn 4y

                    (based on stackoverflow answer to question "is css turing complete")

  12. @dsmagikswsa 4y

    But can we?

  13. @SamsonovAnton 4y

    "Remote code execution via stack overflow in CSS engine" to the rescue!

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