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Thanos Discovers the Power of Database Backups
Databases Post #3449, on Jul 22, 2021 in TG

Thanos Discovers the Power of Database Backups

Description

A four-panel comic strip from CommitStrip featuring the Marvel character Thanos in an office setting. In the first panel, Thanos, holding a custom controller with Infinity Stones, declares, 'Haha, finally... I'm ROOT!!'. In the second panel, he gleefully executes a command shown in a dark overlay: 'DELETE FROM people WHERE rand() < 0.5', exclaiming 'And BAM!'. This action mimics his infamous 'snap' from the Avengers films. The third panel shifts to two developers, dressed as Thor and Captain Marvel, who look unimpressed. One asks, 'OK? Are you done playing around with the database?', and the other adds, 'Did you really think we didn't have any backups?'. In the final panel, a defeated and sweating Thanos laments, 'Well, I guess I should roll back to the last backup, but man, what a headache... and on a Friday...'. The comic humorously trivializes a villain's ultimate power by juxtaposing it with standard IT disaster recovery procedures. The joke resonates with experienced engineers who understand that even the most catastrophic actions on a production system are often just a 'headache' to fix, thanks to robust backup and recovery plans, especially highlighting the common pain of dealing with incidents on a Friday

Comments

12
Anonymous ★ Top Pick Thanos thought he had the ultimate power, but every senior SRE knows the true infinity stones are: automated backups, point-in-time recovery, tested restore scripts, off-site replicas, and immutable logs
  1. Anonymous ★ Top Pick

    Thanos thought he had the ultimate power, but every senior SRE knows the true infinity stones are: automated backups, point-in-time recovery, tested restore scripts, off-site replicas, and immutable logs

  2. Anonymous

    "DELETE FROM people WHERE rand() < 0.5"? Nice snap, Thanos - our 5-minute PITR backups just turned your existential purge into a restore-latency benchmark

  3. Anonymous

    The real infinity stone was the production database credentials we collected along the way - and just like Thanos, every junior dev with root access thinks they can 'balance' the database until they realize the backup strategy was also perfectly balanced... as all things shouldn't be

  4. Anonymous

    Ah yes, the classic 'Thanos approach' to database optimization - randomly DELETE half your records and call it load balancing. At least he had the courtesy to use rand() < 0.5 instead of just dropping the table entirely. Though executing this with root on a Friday really captures that special blend of hubris and poor timing that separates junior chaos from senior-level catastrophe. The real infinity stone here? That backup strategy the team actually implemented, because we all know the true villain origin story starts with 'We'll set up backups next sprint.'

  5. Anonymous

    Thanos gets root and runs DELETE FROM people WHERE rand() < 0.5 in prod; SREs hit PITR and undo the snap - RPO=0 beats Infinity Stones. Friday change window closed

  6. Anonymous

    Root access: Achieving Thanos-level balance by randomly dusting 95% of prod records - perfectly imperfect on a Friday

  7. Anonymous

    DELETE FROM people WHERE rand() < 0.5 is chaos engineering for databases - until RPO demands the gauntlet only restores to last night’s dump and your Friday becomes PITR-day

  8. @feskow 4y

    wait, does this work?

  9. @SuperiorProgramming 4y

    No

  10. @azizhakberdiev 4y

    Avengers used time machine to use backup of their world to find these stones before thanos does it

  11. @sylfn 4y

    warning 1 of 3 for (no mention) - no ads

  12. Deleted Account 4y

    Just rollback the transaction lol

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