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Apple Ports as Paid DLC
Apple Post #2996, on Apr 20, 2021 in TG

Apple Ports as Paid DLC

Why is this Apple meme funny?

Level 1: Paying for Extra Holes

This is like buying a nice new desk and discovering the cheaper version has fewer places to put your pencils, charger, and lamp, so you have to pay more just to set up your normal stuff. The funny part is that the product looks simple and elegant, but the person using it still needs practical places to plug things in.

Level 2: The Port Tax

An iMac is an all-in-one desktop computer from Apple. In this screenshot, the three models are different configurations of the same colorful M1 iMac line.

Apple M1 is the processor family inside these machines. The table compares CPU cores, GPU cores, storage, memory, display, ports, Ethernet, keyboard features, and price.

Thunderbolt / USB 4 and USB 3 are connection standards for plugging in devices. They can be used for things like drives, adapters, displays, and accessories, depending on the device and cable. Gigabit Ethernet means wired network support, which can matter when Wi-Fi is unreliable or when stable speed is important.

The meme is about the way the base $1,299.00 model shows dashes for some useful connectivity rows, while the $1,499.00 and $1,699.00 models include them. For a developer, that can feel backwards: ports are not glamorous, but they are often necessary.

Level 3: Ports as Upsell

The screenshot is funny because it is not edited into absurdity; the comparison table already does the work. Three blue 24-inch iMac configurations sit side by side, all labeled:

Apple M1 Chip

The base model lists:

8-Core CPU 7-Core GPU Two Thunderbolt / USB 4 ports

Then it shows dashes where the higher tiers list:

Two USB 3 ports Gigabit Ethernet Magic Keyboard with Touch ID

The highlighted Two USB 3 ports row in the $1,499.00 column is the punchline. The $1,299.00 model has the same general product identity, the same 24-inch 4.5K Retina display line, the same 8GB unified memory line, and the same basic M1 story. But ordinary connectivity appears as a pricing boundary. The joke is that on a desktop computer, "more places to plug things in" feels less like a luxury feature and more like oxygen with a SKU.

This is Apple product segmentation at its most surgical. The company is very good at making a product matrix where each step upward feels small enough to justify and annoying enough to avoid ignoring. More GPU core, more storage, Ethernet, extra USB 3 ports, Touch ID keyboard: none of these alone makes the middle tier look wildly different, but together they turn the base tier into a lesson in compromise.

For developers, the irritation is especially sharp. Development machines accumulate peripherals: external drives, display adapters, audio gear, test devices, hardware security keys, phones, tablets, microcontroller boards, and the hub that exists only because the last hub ran out of ports. The post message complains that Apple "actually included an option for at least something except USB-C," but the screenshot's exact claim is narrower: the higher models add Two USB 3 ports, not necessarily old rectangular USB-A. Still, the emotional read is correct. Connectivity, which used to be boring infrastructure, has become a feature you compare like storage capacity.

The broader marketing vs reality joke is that clean hardware design often externalizes mess. A thin, colorful all-in-one looks beautiful on the product page. On a developer desk, limited ports become dongles, docks, power bricks, and cable topology diagrams that nobody asked to maintain. Apple did not remove the complexity; it moved it behind a tier choice and, occasionally, behind your monitor.

Description

The image is a three-column Apple Store comparison screenshot for colorful 24-inch M1 iMac configurations, each topped by a partial iMac image and color swatches. Visible text includes "Blue," "New," "Apple M1 Chip," CPU/GPU specs, storage, memory, "24-inch 4.5K Retina display," "Two Thunderbolt / USB 4 ports," and prices of "$1,299.00," "$1,499.00," and "$1,699.00," with monthly installment text below. The middle and right configurations add "Two USB 3 ports," "Gigabit Ethernet," and "Magic Keyboard with Touch ID," while the base model shows dashes in those rows; the "Two USB 3 ports" line is highlighted in blue. The meme criticizes Apple's feature segmentation: ordinary connectivity becomes a premium upsell in a product line marketed as simple and consumer-friendly.

Categories

Apple Hardware DeveloperExperience DX Marketing IndustryTrends Hype

Common Tags

Apple AppleProducts AppleM1 AppleSilicon Hardware HardwareTradeoffs ConsumerElectronics CostBenefitAnalysis ProductManagement ProductDesignProcess DeveloperExpectationsVsReality MarketingVsReality IndustryIrony TechIndustryHumor

Comments

53
Anonymous ★ Top Pick Apple didn't remove ports; they normalized them into a pricing tier.
  1. Anonymous ★ Top Pick

    Apple didn't remove ports; they normalized them into a pricing tier.

  2. dev_meme 5y

    if you wanna pay 1500$ for 256GB storage, go ahead man. I paid 200€ for that.

    1. dev_meme 5y

      I mean, only screen with same specification like in iMac will cost you something around 800-1000$

      1. dev_meme 5y

        And not to mention that there is actually no proper replacement for Retina

        1. dev_meme 5y

          retina is just a brand name by apple for their screens that have a higher pixel density

      2. dev_meme 5y

        https://www.amazon.com/BenQ-Photographer-SW271-3840x2160-Calibration/dp/B076CTL3BD/ref=sr_1_2?dchild=1&keywords=4k+24+inch+screen&qid=1618943841&refinements=p_36%3A80000-%2Cp_n_feature_thirteen_browse-bin%3A17751773011&rnid=17751770011&s=pc&sr=1-2

        1. dev_meme 5y

          that's way better than what you're getting from apple tho

          1. dev_meme 5y

            Just comment for you from comments to this screen ;)

            1. dev_meme 5y

              Sorry, I didn't highlighted exact sentence "The screen is very good - not in the same league as Apple screens but as good as it gets for a PC."

              1. dev_meme 5y

                another apple fanboy, I see

                1. Deleted Account 5y

                  someone's gonna be a non-admin soon

                  1. dev_meme 5y

                    i meant the comment, not the admin, but I hope that the admin doesn't kick (correction: un-admin) me because we disagree on something unrelated lol

                    1. Deleted Account 5y

                      me too

                    2. Deleted Account 5y

                      i forgot your handle again

                      1. dev_meme 5y

                        @RiedleroD

                        1. Deleted Account 5y

                          thanks

                    3. @chupasaurus 5y

                      Sending the report to the channel owner 🙃

                    4. dev_meme 5y

                      Lol, ofc no 😂

                      1. dev_meme 5y

                        good 👍🏻 got some bad experiences regarding that unfortunately

            2. dev_meme 5y

              the cable wasn't right - very embarassing for the company, but not really a problem.

      3. dev_meme 5y

        ding dong you are wrong

        1. @yarmoliq 5y

          https://www.rtings.com/monitor/reviews/samsung/ue590

          1. dev_meme 5y

            It was just the first 4k monitor I found on amazon, jeez

            1. dev_meme 5y

              I don't care enough to actually find something good

  3. dev_meme 5y

    they call it "magic keyboard"? wow

    1. @WickedClassy 5y

      The "magic" is automatic bluetooth pairing

      1. dev_meme 5y

        bluetooth pairing with what? What does an integrated keyboard need bluetooth for?

        1. @WickedClassy 5y

          It's not an integrated keyboard, it's wireless https://www.apple.com/shop/product/MLA22LL/A/magic-keyboard-us-english

          1. dev_meme 5y

            ohh my bad, I thought we were still talking about the laptops

  4. dev_meme 5y

    You have to compare them side-by-side

  5. @aefremov2600 5y

    etot pablic realno na angliskom ili vse risuyutsya?

    1. Deleted Account 5y

      fuck off

    2. dev_meme 5y

      English only please warning 1/3 for @aefremov2600

    3. @p4vook 5y

      who are you to mix the cards in casino?

  6. @asm3r 5y

    No reason to use this crap all this years. Just setup any linux distro and configure it as you need, without sweeping windows into toilet

    1. Deleted Account 5y

      nah, winholes whouldbe in the toilet, where it's supposed to be

      1. @asm3r 5y

        https://youtu.be/ouFgMO1f2ag I'm about this time consuming shit

  7. @yarmoliq 5y

    You serious?

  8. @yarmoliq 5y

    It's the cheapest one

  9. @yarmoliq 5y

    It has very bad color accuracy

  10. @yarmoliq 5y

    backlight

  11. @yarmoliq 5y

    etc

  12. @yarmoliq 5y

    A good display will cost you a lot of money

  13. @yarmoliq 5y

    And yes

  14. @yarmoliq 5y

    For the people who don't care thatll be fine

  15. @yarmoliq 5y

    and that's why you probably don't need a mac

    1. dev_meme 5y

      I have a pentium, man, and I can't complain. I got what I paid for, 200€ ain't much and what I got ain't much either.

  16. @yarmoliq 5y

    But adding 250gb for 300$ or whatever

    1. dev_meme 5y

      but that's the kinda stuff that drives me to completely avoid apple at all costs

  17. @yarmoliq 5y

    Is kinda scam

  18. @yarmoliq 5y

    Not gonna lie

  19. @yarmoliq 5y

    But on the other hand

  20. @yarmoliq 5y

    You can't finand another device for the price of the base model with the power m1 provides, color accuracy of the display, quality of webcam\sound

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