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Post #7096 · source on Telegram
ESG Funds Investing in Nuclear Weapons While Defense Stocks Outperform Clean Energy
Description
A Bloomberg data visualization with two charts. Top chart: 'More ESG Equity Funds Are Investing in Nuclear Weapons' comparing 2022 vs 2025 across three categories: Funds that 'promote' ESG (orange), Funds with ESG 'objective' (black), and All EU ESG funds (grey), showing significant growth in all categories from 2022 to 2025 (with EU ESG funds reaching ~4,500 in 2025). Source note explains arms makers may provide components, support systems, and transport. Bottom chart: 'Defense Returns Beat Clean Energy' showing three indexes from Jan-Aug 2025: S&P Global 1200 Aerospace & Defense Index (green, ~140), S&P Global Clean Energy Transition Index (black, ~120), and S&P 500 Index (grey, ~100). Data indexed as of December 31, 2024
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26Comment deleted
ESG funds investing in nukes is the financial equivalent of naming your variable 'isSecure' and storing the password in plaintext -- technically the label is there, but the implementation contradicts everything
Looks like their ESG pipeline has a silent ‘grantExceptNukes’ clause - classic case of a compliance feature flag defaulting to true in production
Just like how we name our variables 'finalFinalVersion2_ACTUALLY_FINAL', ESG funds have discovered that 'ethical' is just another configurable parameter that can be overridden when the defense sector's returns outperform clean energy by 20 points
When your ESG fund's definition of 'sustainable' includes sustainably high returns from defense contractors, you know we've reached peak financial engineering. It's like implementing a 'green' deployment pipeline that exclusively launches missiles - technically carbon-neutral if you don't count the explosions. The real innovation here isn't in clean energy; it's in the mental gymnastics required to reconcile 'ethical investing' with nuclear weapons portfolios. At least when we deprecate legacy code, we don't rebrand it as 'vintage architecture' and charge a premium for it
Enterprise translation: set ESG_PROMOTE=true, fund the “nuclear” microservice, and call it defense-in-depth - because on exec dashboards security ROI always outpaces the clean refactor by quarter end
ESG funds bankrolling nukes: the ultimate blast radius from unchecked dependency hell
ESG screening feels like setting 'strict=false' on your SQL filter - add 'arms_makers may provide components/support/transport' to the WHERE clause and suddenly the join pulls in defense stocks; the dashboard looks greener, returns look happier, and ethics is just a non-blocking warning
we just need to nuke the bad people Comment deleted
that's a lot of people - means a lot of wasted land after the nukes. there must be a cleaner way Comment deleted
micro nukes Comment deleted
Ripley's speech from Aliens 2 about ultimate solution.gif Comment deleted
potential banhammer so I won't post it ❤️ Comment deleted
? Comment deleted
this? Comment deleted
India for example Comment deleted
Explain Comment deleted
ah Comment deleted
I don't see why that would be a ban reason Comment deleted
wordplay on "final solution" in my first message Comment deleted
I don't get it Comment deleted
oh it's the english name for "endlösung (der judenfrage)" Comment deleted
yep Comment deleted
iffy, but just a play on words. I'm fine with that Comment deleted
ESG is a scam Comment deleted
My brothers in Christ, I am worried Comment deleted
Yep, that would cause major increase in code quality around the globe, which would make mediocre programmers look bad Comment deleted