Saving every jar: a Java dev’s venn diagram of hoarding and zero-waste ideals
Description
The image is a simple three-circle Venn diagram on a white background. The left green circle is labelled "Being a hoarder", the right pale yellow circle reads "Going zero waste", and the bottom light red/pink circle says "Programming in Java". Where all three circles overlap in the center, darkened by the layered transparencies, the text states: ""I'm going to save this jar."" The visual joke hinges on the homonym "jar": glass jars that hoarders and zero-waste advocates keep, and the JAR archives Java developers endlessly stash in their build directories. For seasoned engineers, it nods to the ever-growing ~/.m2 or Gradle cache, illustrating how environmental virtue signals inadvertently mirror the compulsive retention of build artifacts
Comments
12Comment deleted
If a senior Java dev ever Marie-Kondo’d their ~/.m2 folder, Maven Central’s outbound bandwidth would spike like a Black Friday sale
After 15 years in the industry, my .m2 repository has become a digital archaeological site where ancient versions of commons-logging coexist with cutting-edge reactive streams, all because somewhere, somehow, a transitive dependency from 2009 still thinks it needs them
Every Java developer knows the struggle: you start with one JAR dependency, then suddenly your lib folder looks like a zero-waste enthusiast's pantry - except instead of reducing waste, you're accumulating every version of Apache Commons ever released. The real question isn't whether to save the JAR, it's whether you can even remember what half of them do anymore. At least hoarders can Marie Kondo their collections; we're stuck with transitive dependencies that spark absolutely no joy but break everything if removed
Our zero waste policy in Java: never delete a .jar from Artifactory; it’s either rollback insurance or the only thing keeping the monolith compiling
Java's zero-waste manifesto: Every JAR gets classpath immortality, because one day you'll need that obscure 2005 dependency
Nothing says zero waste like an Artifactory retention=forever policy, until the classloader grabs the 2017 Guava and you rediscover jar hell
👋😼 Comment deleted
owning anime figurines Comment deleted
How dare you 😳 Comment deleted
zero waste people are just hoarders who don't buy anything Comment deleted
It's 2010-ish You got that cellphone running java apps. You know that you will go broke if you enable your data in your place so the only source for jars is your local dc++ network. You casually check it for new ones once in a while simply typing something like .jar or .jad into the search bar. You are downloading all of them, because chances of getting a compatible one are quite small. Scrolling through the list of colored lines (means that you already have or had the file) you see the white one. Bit of excitement in your eyes -"I'm going to save this jar" Comment deleted
People with one-way satellite equipment (DVB-T) may scan the brodacast signal and grab a copy of any interesting file dowloaded by other people on the same transponder — this is called "satellite fishing". 😎 Comment deleted