Skip to content
DevMeme
3656 of 7590
CorporateCulture Post #3994 · source on Telegram

Corporate propaganda collage: celebrating surveillance, weekend work, and healthy workplace tears

Description

The image is a monochrome meme-style collage of corporate headlines and office imagery. Visible headlines include: "The Best Employee Monitoring Software for 2021" with the sub-blurb "Managing productivity is difficult during a pandemic…", "STOP - You might be committing time clock fraud!", "The Advantages of Monitoring Employees", "10 Advantages To Working On Weekends", and "Why crying employees can sometimes be a sign of a healthy workplace" (dated 09-25-19 under the section WORKPLACE EVOLUTION). A cavernous open-plan office photo displays a wall slogan that reads "work hard. have fun. make history." In the lower-right, a video thumbnail advertises "Inspirational Advice from a 10 Year old - Grant Cardone" with on-screen text "but seriously i can't wait to work i can't wait to really work to have a" beside a "GET IT NOW" button. Several small photos of workers are present, all facial features blurred. The collage is overlaid on a faint grayscale portrait, underscoring an impersonal, surveillance-heavy corporate atmosphere. Technically, the meme satirizes employee-monitoring SaaS tools, remote time-tracking, and management spin that reframes burnout, weekend labor, and emotional breakdowns as evidence of a “healthy” culture

Comments

21
Anonymous ★ Top Pick We built distributed tracing so execs could follow a request across 30 microservices; they loved it so much they deployed the same agent to my keyboard - now any gap over 15 minutes is logged as “latent productivity” and my Saturday tears trigger a paging alert
  1. Anonymous ★ Top Pick

    We built distributed tracing so execs could follow a request across 30 microservices; they loved it so much they deployed the same agent to my keyboard - now any gap over 15 minutes is logged as “latent productivity” and my Saturday tears trigger a paging alert

  2. Anonymous

    After 20 years of optimizing distributed systems, I've learned the only thing that scales worse than MongoDB is the human capacity to tolerate being treated like a poorly-configured Kubernetes pod that management keeps trying to squeeze more CPU cycles from while simultaneously reducing its resource limits

  3. Anonymous

    When your company's 'employee monitoring software' budget exceeds their CI/CD infrastructure spend, and they wonder why the best engineers keep leaving for companies that measure output by shipped features rather than mouse movements. Nothing says 'we trust our senior architects' quite like requiring them to prove they're not committing time clock fraud while debugging a distributed systems issue at 2 AM

  4. Anonymous

    Management rebranded surveillance as ‘employee observability’ - Grafana now graphs weekend commits and tears/min; Goodhart’s law ensured the org hit its KPIs by burning through the only error budget left: people

  5. Anonymous

    When Prometheus starts scraping keystroke metrics instead of pod health - true full-stack observability

  6. Anonymous

    Leadership bought bossware and basically shipped OpenTelemetry for humans - keystrokes to metrics, screenshots to object storage, and an SLO of tears per sprint under 1 that mysteriously breaches every time we roll out weekend advantages

  7. @thisisluxion 4y

    this isn't even that dev related but my god we need to do something about this

    1. dev_meme 4y

      Or just "work harder" In fact, in many workplaces that's a thing

      1. @thisisluxion 4y

        sadly, I know

    2. Deleted Account 4y

      +

  8. @Bodziek 4y

    I had a software on my work pc which logged every open window/process

    1. @denisndenis 4y

      Sound like A LOT of logs. And someone really monitor it?

      1. @Bodziek 4y

        kind of, there are software platforms for that stuff

  9. @RiedleroD 4y

    ouch

  10. @RiedleroD 4y

    am half burned out from school, so this hits extra hard :(

  11. Deleted Account 4y

    God I swear my dad's company uses this shit kind of software, convinces me that we need more arsonists in this world

  12. @galgvithr 4y

    You cant work effectively more than 6 hours a day. Usually people actually do work in 4 hours a day, the rest is bullshit they do to not look like they're slacking off. Why would employer do this shit?

  13. @galgvithr 4y

    Fucking hell

  14. @feskow 4y

    Lmfao

  15. @sylfn 4y

    you do really expect the bot to work on picture? @feskow bot returned nothing, is this intended?

    1. @feskow 4y

      Oh shit it makes None type error

Use J and K for navigation